My head hurts Monday.
I was going to call it My fucking head hurts Monday, but then I thought better of it considering some of you have that comment luv thingy and probably wouldn’t appreciate the f bomb on your blogs.
Your welcome.
I already know I am awesome, but feel free to tell me again. And again. Cause my kinda narcissism needs constant stroking. Oooh, like that, yeah…
Sorry. Feeling a little, um, frustrated ifyouknowwhatImean….
So I have been trawling the internetz for those freaking memey carnival thingies and can’t find one that doesn’t suck arse or is written/coordinated/pulled out of the arse of some Christian chick. And I am a biatch, but I ain’t linking to some innocent woman making her own soap, with my foul mouthed madness. Shit the smiting would come down hard then. Like Kelley getting her freak on on YouTube or something…
I know some of you do a Menu Plan one and then there was the Naked Monday that MP suggested. Google can’t find any of the fuckers.
Stoopid Google.
So I will just go with my own. Cause I am that lazy awesome.
What makes your head hurt Kelley? I hear you ask.
~ Banging my head against a wall. That’ll do it.
~ Stabbing myself in the eye with a mascara wand while trying to drink my latte at the same time - I am a multitasker - the doorbell ringing at 7am scaring the fuck out of me causing said eye pokage and then hitting my head on the cabinet reaching in for a cotton bud to fix the mess.
~ Chicks acting like the blogworld is high school all over again. Oh get over yourselves bitches. You are fucking BLOGGERS for Christsakes. The real world thinks you are a fucking nerd. And girl, you are not as hot as you think you are. And I bet you smell. Like old cheese. That has just been freshly vomited up by a cat.
~ My mother calling me at work, again, to change the plans of her babysitting, again, and then coming home to find that she has OK’d ANOTHER teen sleepover for tomorrow night. That makes only 1 night in the last week without someone elses kid sleeping in my house and nomming on my chocolate.
And yes it was that night. And thinking about that makes my fucking head hurt again. Along with turning a vibrant shade of pink. At this rate I will have to match my shoes to my face rather than my handbag.
~ Not enough coffee. You hear me Coffee Bitch? I know I am making you do my work and shit, but hey, I will give you 10 minutes to go and get me a latte. Cause a girl has to be nice like that to the man that has a title like ‘Boss’.
But something that doesn’t make my head hurt? Today’s shoe selection.
And this week, every day unless I forget or get distracted by the shiny, I will give you a Kelley made memey thing AND a pic of the shoe of the day.
Cause, as we established before, I am THAT fucking awesome.
So my lovelies, what makes your head hurt today?
Oh and that stuff in the sidebar there? The BlogHer ads? Some might say ’sell out’ I say ‘buy Mummy some shoes’
Popularity: 46% [?]
39 Responses to “My head hurts Monday.”
June 30th, 2008 at 10:20 pm
You pulled the ‘fucking’ from the title because of that?
That’s your soul lost forever, right there.
And if some fucker doesn’t tell me what this drama is about I’m gonna be not happy.
June 30th, 2008 at 10:30 pm
Gawd but you’re scary! Even after your latte.
So scary in fact that I’ll be sending the body-of-a-god courier around with the shoes of your choice. Just don’t hurt me….
June 30th, 2008 at 10:30 pm
Well my mother arrived today for a week. Suspect that counts as a head hurt moment. At least Bombay Sapphire was on sale and we got 2 bottles. Should last the week… That will make my head hurt more though, maybe!
June 30th, 2008 at 10:33 pm
I know I’m a blogging virgin, and I know I am not worthy, but how do you get the avatar thingy happening on your comments?
Do I have to drink the sweat of some sacrificial vestal goat?
Cheers,
Artoholic
June 30th, 2008 at 11:00 pm
I’ll email you my head hurts moment.
It’s a beauty!
June 30th, 2008 at 11:10 pm
The internet is full of stoopid, that makes my head hurt. But they also make me feel normal..so I love that.
June 30th, 2008 at 11:18 pm
Excuse me, yes I am that hot. And I smell fucking awesome. But I’ll give you the nerd thing.
June 30th, 2008 at 11:22 pm
Wanna trade for the toilet the kids clogged upstairs that won’t unclog and has seeped on the floor?
June 30th, 2008 at 11:40 pm
I LOVE the shoes! I totally want to see Kelley’s shoes every day (does that sound weird?).
And how did you know everyone in the real world thinks I’m a nerd (actually they mostly think I’m antisocial and unfriendly).
June 30th, 2008 at 11:45 pm
Oh, looky… pretty shoes. Very sassy my friend, where are they taking you today?
June 30th, 2008 at 11:49 pm
apparently, i don’t have to do ANYTHING to make my head hurt.
i just woke up with the headache that ate new york city.
gonna be a great day — i can tell.
June 30th, 2008 at 11:50 pm
I will get smited with you. And, I think it is not coincidence that last week we both had posts with the word “smite” involved. Because we are birthday twins, that’s why.
June 30th, 2008 at 11:57 pm
Nomming is my new word of the week.
And how HOLY FUCKING HOTNESS are those shoes??
July 1st, 2008 at 12:06 am
I covet those shoes.
Also … I have NO IDEA why the internet is high school all over again, but you TOTALLY hit the nail on the head.
Also? You lost the game.
July 1st, 2008 at 12:35 am
Headache–cleaning the fucking house, AGAIN…there, I used the ‘F’ bomb…damn, felt good!
Stylin babe with those shoes! I’d be crippled if I walked in them…my saggy baggy knees can’t handle even tiny heels…sad me……
July 1st, 2008 at 12:50 am
headache=5 hours of sleep and having to bath a child and then drag her to court to continue child support battles. without coffee. yet.
July 1st, 2008 at 12:50 am
My right ear has been hurting for two days and that is making my head hurt.
Oh and also that the points for the final exam won’t be posted till tomorrow but the teacher told us it’d be posted today so I have to go back tomorrow.
And it’s bloody hot up here on the thrid floor.
I think that’s it.
July 1st, 2008 at 3:47 am
Last! I’m last. Yeah and fuck all you that come after me cause I called it first. To the rest of you: You all lost the GUM! ha ha ha
Oh, and Kelley…sounds like somebody has a case of the Mondays! bwahahahahaha.
July 1st, 2008 at 3:55 am
Loving the shoes. Any chance of a close up? Such shapely ankles…
That enough stroking for you?
Customers made my head ache today, but I have a job interview on Saturday, so hopefully I wont be here much longer.
July 1st, 2008 at 5:52 am
Before I did anything this morning I was diving for the ibuprofin. At least I can see.
And, fuck Kelley, I wish I had shoes that hott…or at least someplace to wear them!
July 1st, 2008 at 6:20 am
My fucking head hurts mainly due to the headboard. Oh yeah touchy subject, sorry!
July 1st, 2008 at 7:46 am
My headache - taking turns throwing up with the baby on Sunday night and now it’s DH and DD8’s turn in throwing up
July 1st, 2008 at 10:01 am
My Monday headache which has stretched into Tuesday. A house full of laundry and general mess for me to deal with.
July 1st, 2008 at 10:11 am
I am SO that hot. Dammit! But I agree, this is not high school. Because these days I’m hot and glamorous, and back then I was a nerd… hang on. Crap. I’m an OLD nerd. Thanks, Kel, I needed that *snort*
Sympathy for the headbanging eyepoking adventures. Hope you poked in the eye whoever it was that rang the doorbell at such a ridiculous hour. Unless they were there to deliver shoes, of course.
PS. Still love those shoes.
July 1st, 2008 at 10:15 am
What makes my head hurt?
When some footwear obsessed chick forgets to duck dive into her morning latte and BUY.A.LOCK.woman!
Mascara? I thought that was the main highway outta Italy…
July 1st, 2008 at 10:25 am
You are fucking awesome!
July 1st, 2008 at 10:25 am
Ohhh such purty shoes! My head hurts at the moment, but I think that’s cause I’ve been looking at the computer screen for, oh… about 4 hours now? *time to switch it offff*
July 1st, 2008 at 12:08 pm
what makes my head hurt today:
when cats point their arse in the general direction of the litter tray and say: meh. close enough.
July 1st, 2008 at 1:02 pm
Love the shoes, and think you are a bitch ‘cos you have them and I don’t.
Fucking teenage sons who are bright and then get reports saying they are cruising (while hauling in B’s), and spending all fucking night at parent teacher interviews listening again to how bright but lazy my freaking sons are.
THAT makes my head hurt. Sorry you asked now? I don’t give a fuck
July 1st, 2008 at 1:39 pm
Having to wake up on Mondays make my head hurt. Period.
July 1st, 2008 at 2:46 pm
I had something really witty to say about something, but then I saw those shoes. Shoes . . .
July 1st, 2008 at 3:27 pm
What makes my head hurt?
Doctors who tell me that the disease is viral and then prescribe more antibiotics. That makes my head hurt. That and changing nappies full of antibiotic poo.
July 1st, 2008 at 6:06 pm
Thinking about all those shoes my wife “needs” = headache. Hmmm wrong place for this type of comment…
July 1st, 2008 at 6:37 pm
What makes my head hurt? Trying to work out what kind of mood the f***er is in THIS time, whether or not I should speak or keep my mouth shut (depends on what set him off)and what the heck I should feed him for dinner. He’s demanding a “proper” dinner. HUH???
Oh and you are awesome. Better now? No? Have some more chocolate.
July 1st, 2008 at 7:43 pm
BoxBoy: Yeah, I am a sell out. AND I didn’t get to go blog hopping today anyway so there was no need…
Artoholic Cindy: So where is he? I have been sitting at the fucking door all day waiting and now my arse has gone to sleep.
Fiona: A week! I would have to hide all the sharpy pointy things beforehand to stop me from gouging out my eyes and perforating my eardrums if my mother did that. I hope to The Almighty Smiter your mother is not like mine.
Aroholic Cinday: I have emailed you and am waiting for the pics… anyone else that wants to know go to http://en.gravatar.com/
Bettina: And that it WAS!!!!
Leigh: You must be a stoopid magnet, does your gravatational pull erase IQ’s?
Missy: Your awesomeness is only a by product of knowing me.
Always at home and uncool: That is so uncool. You need to get out more. And buy a plunger.
Kylie: They are rather awesome aren’t they. I stroke them and call them my pretties.
OhMommy: Just kicking arse at work. Arse kicking is so much more fun when it is done in fucking fantastic shoes.
The planet of Janet: Take some drugs and take out your mood on the offspring. As is your right.
Sunshine: My fabulous twin. The shiny happy to my snarly snarky.
A Whole Lot of Nothing: And now Holy Fucking Hotness is mine.
Moo: Fucking bitch. I am so gunna get you after school…
hotmamamia: Wait till you see todays then… and I have higher.
Zoeyjane: Oh my lovely, smootches. I am here for you K?
Lilacspecs: So all good then?
VE: You are a fucking madman. That is why I love you. Lets not tell MPS though OK?
Solomon: Can always count on you for an ego stroke. Crossing fingers for Saturday for you!
Jen: Who needs somewhere to wear them? I vaccd in my hooker heels on the weekend.
Womb4Improvement: Bwaaaa haaaaa haaaaaaa! Biatch.
Tina: Tandem vomiting! Wow, who won?
Tess: My house gives you a headache?
Naomi: Yup you are hot. Basking in my white hot awesomeness…
Jayne: You know I still haven’t had a chance to get one?!
Marita: THAT is what I like to hear!! Tell me again, softer…
Marilyn: And it took you FOUR HOURS on the internet before visiting me?
Kitty Polestar: Get your cat to come and meet Boo. They can have a close enough comp.
Suze: Change the sons to daughters and I hear ya… stoopid fucking teens.
Sandy: Good point.
LaskiGal: I understand. I get distracted by them all the time.
Tiff: Smootches sweetie. It fucking sucks.
BusyDad: Um, yeah… stoopid. You are SUPPOSED to say lovely shoes do you need money to buy more…
River: FMD that was me the other night! Arsehat. Slap him while he is sleeping from me K?
July 2nd, 2008 at 11:20 am
I love your shoes. I will have them. Thankyou.
What makes my head hurt? This stupid f-ing cough that I have makes my head hurt. Everytime I cough, I think my head is going to explode and I see little shiny stars….
That can’t be good.
But ordinarily - kids that whine that there is no cutlery / plates etc left but have failed to LOOK IN THE DISHWASHER
July 2nd, 2008 at 12:11 pm
“~ Chicks acting like the blogworld is high school all over again. Oh get over yourselves bitches. You are fucking BLOGGERS for Christsakes. The real world thinks you are a fucking nerd. And girl, you are not as hot as you think you are. And I bet you smell. Like old cheese. That has just been freshly vomited up by a cat.”
And yet, I was busy having a pity party and missed the entire fucking thing.
July 4th, 2008 at 2:59 pm
With so many headaches on Monday, I suggest that you simply SKIP MONDAYS from now on! Go straight from Sundays to Tuesdays! No more headaches on Monday.
July 9th, 2008 at 3:05 am
Naked Monday’s are over here:
http://stlouistravelphotos.blogspot.com/
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