Sleep.
Before I hit publish, I need to preface this with I am tired. Bone achingly, hold-a-pillow-over-my-face-and-scream, shitty at the world, tired. I don’t want sympathy, but if I make you smile, let me know, cause that will make me happy. Truly it will. I live to make you smile.
Any offense taken at this post is your sole responsibility. I really don’t care. Cause, I don’t know if you know, I am freaking tired.
The internet seems to be having issues with sleep. Every blog I visit seems to have some whinger banging on about ‘oh woe is me, I can’t sleep’ or ‘little precious didn’t sleep last night and now I am totally exhausted’. OK, I admit some of the whining is legitamite, sick kids and insomnia and all that, but for the most part these people are pissing me off.
I haven’t had a decent nights sleep in, lets see,
3265 days
or
78360 hours
or since the birth of Boo.
When Boo was born he stopped breathing. So for the first 18 months he had a breathing monitor strapped to his belly. Affectionately called his ‘ticker’. Little bastard slept all through the night. I spent the time listening for the alarm to go off.
Then the little shit decided that day sleeps were not needed. At 8 months old. The kid did not sleep during daylight hours (save being sick) from before he could crawl.
I used to be a sleeper. 9 or 10 hours a night was common. DH used to say that in winter I went into hibernation. It wasn’t unusual for me to crawl into bed with a hot chocolate (sometimes laced with Baileys or somesuch) when the girls went to bed at 7pm. Kids in bed at 7pm. Sigh. I am lucky if I am in bed before the next day…..
And I was a heavy sleeper. Nothing could wake me. I mean NOTHING *snigger*. Now the slightest change in breathing pattern of the child across the hall and my eyes fly open begging God, Allah, The Goddess, anyone who will listen, that Boo will stay. in. bed.
And then there are the nights when Boo turns on the stealth ninja moves and wakes without me hearing. They are the nights where I wake with a start, the intermingled aroma of shit and toothpaste vaguely registering and notice that my bedroom door is shut. Wrestle with the options. Get up now and clean up or try and ignore it for a few more precious minutes of sleep. Then I wake up fully and my heart leaps to my mouth.
Elvis could have left the building.
He could be playing in the backyard or making dirt angels in the next door neighbours driveway. Wearing nothing but a tshirt and a smile. (Ask me how I know. No don’t, just read back posts of my blog. I couldn’t be bothered. Cause I am TIRED!)
Or calling a number he saw on the television. I sprug him a while back calling to inquire about a home loan. Apparently he ordered the house beforehand.
I fly out of bed to survey the destruction. On, at best, 4 hours sleep.
So suck it up people. Have a Nanna nap. I will crochet you a rug while I am up.
Popularity: 8% [?]
















27 Responses to “Sleep.”
October 6th, 2007 at 12:46 am
Damn! no wonder you live on coffee!!
October 6th, 2007 at 2:52 am
Hugs Hun,
I hear you with the no daytime sleeping, cept mine started that at birth (and slept 10 straight hours everynight while I laid there is pain with mastitis cause he wouldnt feed at night but every fifteen minutes during the day).
Thankfully it still sleeps like a log (or any other inanimate object you can think of ) for most of the night, but that also meant it never woke up to go to the toilet until it was 8.5 yrs old, it was either let him wet the bed several times a night (cause it wouldnt wear a nappy) or drag him, dead weight, out of bed, and hold him up, do all the work for him and then drag him back to bed, at least three times each night.
Nowadays it does actually get up, it now sleepwalks to pee in the kitchen or the laundry or even the bathroom, within ten centimetres of where the toilet is located, and one night, even on the toilet (lid closed unfortunately).
And people wonder why i clean the bathroom with straight eucalyptus oil, lol its the only thing i have found the is a disenfectant that 1. doesnt affect his or my skin and 2. seems to get rid of or cover the scent of Boy Pee and Cat Pee (she is also a pain the ass and pees on the floor in the bathroom, senile creature she is).
So, I can not sleep at night at all (not that i ever did sleep well at night unless ill) even when both kids are sleeping. Maybe you and I could tag team, I will take the night shift and you can take the day shift.
I will say thankyou to God many many times over that mine isnt a night time runner, he is terrified of the dark (heaven forbid when we have a blackout after sunset) and there is no way he will go further than the front verandah at night. I dont know that i could cope if he kept escaping.
Many Many Hugs for you and prayers will be sent to every deity I can think of that Boo sleeps through more nights for you (cant guarantee every night, but would an extra one night a week be a start?)
October 6th, 2007 at 3:14 am
It’s hard for me to know what to say when I read posts like this, because I can’t offer advice or anything practical. All I can say is that I am listening and thinking about what your days and nights are like, and hoping some parts become smoother eventually. *hug*
Do you ever read http://shroomhead.blogspot.com/ ? (She’s in the U.S. but might have some insight…?)
*more hugs*
October 6th, 2007 at 5:38 am
today i am one of those whingie whiners whose kid was up all night long with a gasping cough that could wake the dead (but amazingly not his little sister). i hope that there is a nap in your future somewhere! good luck staying upright. i am right there with you.
October 6th, 2007 at 9:55 am
Big hugs babe! I suddenly feel better about my 3 hours uninterrupted sleep last night. Not that I’d whinge about it on my blog. Much.
Maybe I’ll make you smile later when I post the dream I had about Prince William last night!
October 6th, 2007 at 10:40 am
Oh, you did make me smile. See….
When and if I ever get a blog going and complain about sleep deprivation it will be for the one month a year that I have a social life and then stay out too late, possibly consume more alcohol than my body can happily metabolise and pay the price for it the next morning. And in the worst case scenario, I pay the price for about a week.
So, thats all self inflicted and absolutely no sympathy please. But, you have mine for what its worth. Want me to come and mind Boo for you and you can sleep?????? I would eat a Boo Happy Meal, just as long as it didn’t have paprika on it. Blech.
Priscilla
October 6th, 2007 at 10:59 am
Bettina: Well yeah! And I am going through anti wrinkle cream at a rate of knots…
Erin!: thanks for the thoughts and the prayers. Could you make the good nights sleep on a Monday night please? Sorry I am LMAO at the sleepwalking. Will probably happen to me now. Being smited all over the place ATM.
Beth: Thanks for the thoughts and the link. Will wander over there in a minute.
Mama without instructions: You are not one of the whingle whiners cause your kid was sick. I can understand that, sick kids are HARD work. Funny how the sister didn’t wake up, probably scared you would ask for some help!
Kin: Ooooh can’t wait to hear about the dream. I may share the dream I had once about the troupe of firefighters, swoon, and was woken by a phone call from my mum! ewwww!
October 6th, 2007 at 11:13 am
I would be an asshole. Doh. I bitch about sleeplessness a lot and now I will shut up and brew and extra cup with thoughts of you.
October 6th, 2007 at 11:37 am
I only did the sleep deprivation thing for a few years. My eldest didn’t sleept for more than 1 1/2 till she was nearly 1 then it wasn’t until she was nearly 2 that she started sleeping through one or two nights per week and 2 1/2 before that become the norm (by which time I had the next bundle of joy who just knew she had to be an easy bub and slept through from 6 weeks old THANK GOD!) And that was before she was old enough to wreak havoc through the house if she got up and wasn’t heard. I’m f**ked if I can figure out how I managed it for that long so can’t even begin to imagine doing it for as long was what you have without going completely insane. You’re in my prayers.
October 6th, 2007 at 4:04 pm
Hugs to you my darling …. and, yes, you made me smile too.
DS10 pee-d in the bin in the kitchen last week - came out with eyes open and squatted then wandered back to bed. What do ya do? 
I SO get what you’re saying - 7 years and counting here - though I do get maybe 5 hours a night so I am beating you a bit. Between DS10 being an owl (10-11pm) and DS6 being a fowl (5-6am) - chuck in little-Miss-feed-2-hourly and, yes, I am tired.
DH (not the good one) sleeps through it all - falls asleep on the lounge when he wants, sleeps through the night and then sleeps in! Grrr!
And, lol at Er!n
Anyways I will continue to think of you whilst I am night-time-not-sleeping,
xx
October 6th, 2007 at 5:03 pm
Oh dear. I am definitely with you on the sleep deprivation. While The Boy never has had his breathing monitored (how very scary that must have been)….from about 6 months old to about 2 years old, he only slept 5 hours a day. Yes, you read that right. About four hours at night and two half hour naps during the day…Or 5 hours at night, and only one half hour nap during the day.
I hope you get some sleep really soon. Being tired all of the times sucks.
As of now,(he just turned 10),he sleeps longer, but doesn’t go to sleep until 3:00-3:30 AM, sometimes even later. Yes, you read that right too. He doesn’t roam..his phobias prohibit that…he does, on occasion, venture into the kitchen and make all sorts of messes. Some trying to get food, some that just make you scratch your head and wonder. Thank goodness for homeschool. He is able to get about 7 hours of sleep (still not enough)…but because my daughter usually comes busting in my room and crawls in bed with us at about 4:00..I get about 3.5 or 4…5 or 6 on a good day.
I gave up caffeine over a year ago…..what was I thinking?
October 6th, 2007 at 5:04 pm
Holy crap, that was a long comment. I tend to ramble (sleep deprivation?). Sorry.
October 6th, 2007 at 5:41 pm
I think I’d better send over my intravenous coffee drip…
Is there any way you could leave your husband in charge for a night and go sleep at a friends, or a hotel, just to get one good solid worry-free night? Or heck, live dangerously. Make it a weekend.
You did put a smile on my face though.
October 6th, 2007 at 10:46 pm
Angel asked what do you do with the sleepwalking and toileting. LOL HUN I have NO IDEA, if I did, I would have fixed it by now. Most of the time I hear him and run to catch him before he pees in the dishwasher (in the laundry and often open and letting the clean dishes air before I put them away).
Unfortunately his most memorable was a few years ago, during an Enjo party, where he wandered from his room, up the hallway towards his baby sisters room, then did a u turn, wandered back down the hallway and through all of the adults into the kitchen where he peed on the floor while they all stared and then wandered back into his room. I was sitting there in shock (i hadnt seen the hallway part as I was in the process of testing out the oven mit and didnt see him til he came round the corner into the kitchen and started peeing in the corner. Oh well, after wiping it up with a towel, I was able to demonstrate how well my new enjo mop worked!
Kel, I have sent in the request for Monday nights to as many deities as I can name, and a few more under the general direction of Greek and Roman Gods.
October 6th, 2007 at 10:50 pm
Oh and the Owl and Fowl, I have them too, DS being the Owl (would read til 3am if I let him) and DD being the Fowl, who wakes before sunrise every morning unless ill. The Fowl however has LEARNT the hardway to be quiet until the alarm goes off, or she gets in BIG trouble. DS after staying awake til midnight (he is currently emptying the dishwasher in hope of icecream) does NOT agree to being woken at 4am and DBF (when here) having to get up at 6am to go to work does not agree with being woken at 4am by noisy duplo building or the Mickey Mouse March being played at top volume on her cd player. She now lays quietly in bed and reads books until she either falls back asleep or the alarm goes off.
October 7th, 2007 at 5:15 pm
I could very well be one of those who crap on about the lack of sleep I used to get - but that’s just it, the past tense. USED. Now I’m back on track, so I feel bad even commenting, I just want to give you big [HUGS]
October 7th, 2007 at 8:38 pm
[…] on a guilt trip, vowing never to complain again (did you read the disclaimer at the start of the post?????) I thought you would like to hear about someone who could sleep through armageddon, wake up […]
October 7th, 2007 at 9:46 pm
girl: You have a baby! A mighty adorable one too. I just want to smootch him! Of course you will be sleep deprived and complain about it!
Bettina: Thanks for the thoughts. You would think I would be used to it by now. But NUP!
Angel: And I will think of you too babe. Kiss mini me for me will ya? I wish I could fly over to meet her. Oh and you (she says as an afterthought LMAO)
Mel: From what I have heard from adults on the spectrum it is very very common. They just don’t need sleep. Thinking about trialling Melatonin when Boo gets a little older. Seems to be a wonder! You amaze me that you have given up caffeine! I couldn’t function without it.
Will be running to you in a few years when I have to homeschool Boo for high school!
Robin: Yeah I tried that once. Spent the whole night worrying….
Thanks though. Waiting by the mail box for the drip! Might take a while to get here in Australia though
Erin!: This sleepwalking caper makes me happy (for the first time) that Boo is not night trained, heck they told me he wouldn’t be day trained so changing nappies in the middle of the night is a toddle. What if he peed in my fabulous shoes!?!?!
Karen: I wish I had of linked to the blogs I was referring to. I didn’t want to make people feel guilty! But thanks for the hug, warmed me up!
October 7th, 2007 at 11:12 pm
I don’t think its something you get used to - perhaps learn to function inspite of, but get used to - nope!
October 8th, 2007 at 3:41 pm
LOL Kel, I wish i could say my Moo was night trained but he still really isnt, although getting out of bed with the intention of going to the toilet is a big improvement over wetting the bed several times a night, its just that he won’t wear a freakin nappy (lol sure i got freakin from you, its catching). Hasn’t worn one since he was at least 3, tore them to shreds and kicked, bit, screamed, scratched if i tried to put one on him. I used to wait til he was deep asleep and then put them on, but that caused problems in the mornings.
Arrgghh loads of thunder, we had a really fast heavy storm yesterday afternoon. Another one about to hit, time to scramble round unplugging things. Night!
October 8th, 2007 at 8:28 pm
One more thing…the melatonin worked for us for quite awhile….it stopped working.
My son also liked lavender spray on his pillow. That worked for awhile too. I definitely recommend the melatonin. They say take it 30 minute before bed, but it took a bit longer…like 45 minutes to work for my son. The key is…they have to be laying down, ready to sleep….if my son was sitting up playing or had the lights all on…nothing.
November 1st, 2007 at 8:42 pm
[…] I’m Not a Girl, Not Yet a Wino Marie Mallard awarded This Just In Fertile Mertile awarded Magneto Bold Too! Something to Say awarded Twas Brillig Drowning in Laundry awarded Miss Britt Mrs. Incredible […]
November 1st, 2007 at 10:56 pm
[…] well, she’s got a way with words and her post made me remember life is just life and sometimes you have to stop whining and just cover up the […]
November 2nd, 2007 at 1:51 am
Thanks for the perspective, I followed the link on fertilemertile’s blog.
November 2nd, 2007 at 4:22 pm
[…] of the teach-Kelley-new-swear-words gang at Fertile Mertile has awarded me a perfect post award for Sleep. The whingy post I did about Boo not sleeping and flinging insults at the […]
February 5th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
There is a time coming, perhaps in the far distant future, when there will be night after night of uninterrupted, blissfully deep and magically refreshing sleep. They grow up. They really they do. And you get to sleep. You really do. Promise.
February 7th, 2008 at 9:11 pm
Can’t offer you any joy here. All of mine were great sleepers. No 1 son (second child) gave up day time naps when he was about 2 months old but didn’t get whingy at all, just rolled his way around the floor all day, until he learnt to crawl, then he was all over the house and yard, even getting out of the gate and heading off down the footpath. Walked at nine months and very steady on his feet even for first steps. But slept soundly all night every night from 6:30 to 6am.
Leave a Comment